Monthly Archives: July 2014

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DO YOU SEE YOURSELF IN THE RIGHT LIGHT

You might be asking yourself,”What is the right light?” My experience as a coach has shown me that it’s achieving “Positive self-love.”  So many people have trouble with understanding self-love and remaining positive when things aren’t  going well. So many times I hear my friends say, “I see the light shining on you.” I smile, and say, “What does that mean?” They laugh and say,” “You’re the party that we wait for.” I laugh and say, “that’s a big responsibility.” I continue with, “The party that you’re seeing is my belief that each day is ours, and worth fighting for. A little humor doesn’t hurt!

Liking ourselves is our way of transmitting our upbeat feelings to others. Feelings along with actions need to be authentic. A bunch of jokes to cover up one’s real feelings has little to do with the truth. I have a client who would come to my office, at the beginning of  his coaching, and tell me 5 jokes before we would begin. I would say, “I’m glad you like to be funny, but you’re jokes are getting in the way of facing your real problems.” He looked at me and said, “I always do that.” In fact, he said it in a serious tone. He has been with me awhile and has become far more aware of his constant jokes. It isn’t negative to be funny, but it’s uncomfortable to live a lie, which comes from fear.

Why do we fear our truth, when we can live it?  Truth is not scary, it elevates our self-esteem. Truth heals your body, while living lies damages it. Why do we get sick when our lives are so intense. Our bodies are more fragile than we think. Truth and health go hand and hand. Truth, energy and spirit go hand and hand.  My brand has been truth since I was five. At least that’s what my father told me.

The world would be a much better place if we intelligently understood what we need and act upon it. Peace would not be so hard to find! We could all see ourselves in the right light!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Many believe that if we overdo with our personality, and tell a lot of jokes, people may not recognize what we truly feel.  Do you recognize that you often overdo when you are out with someone, just to please that person, and make him or her like you?  If your answer is yes, remember that it won’t work if you are faking what you feel. Faking is lying and has nothing to do with the truth.

Authenticity and believing in yourself are the keys to letting someone get close to you. Why are so many of us afraid of letting someone close to us. Do we think that we feel better when we stay at a distance?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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WE NEED TO DO THE BEST WE CAN!

When you read the title of this blog it is certainly familiar.  So many human beings say this to themselves or to others. It is their way of challenging or inspiring themselves, because it is not always what they do or can do!

There are times when I hear my clients say, “I’m trying to do the best I can.” I find myself responding with, “I’m happy to hear that, but I’d like to hear that “You’re going to do the best you can.” Since my brand is truth,  I tell them the truth. Why is it that you never count the good you do? Why is it that you count what you didn’t do well? They respond with, “I’m not perfect.”  I tend to put my hands over my ears, in frustration, and say, “nobody’s perfect”!  I calm down and say, “sorry, but we have worked on the fact that there is no perfection. You are good enough!”

My teachings as a coach are live your truth, self-love, believe in yourself, courage, take a risk, and recognize your talent and ability.  As clients come to me for the first time, I ask them to write three lists. What do I like about myself? What I don’t I like about myself, and How have I sabotaged myself in my relationships? The first list is one that they have a very difficult time with. Can you believe that? The second list is long and easy for them. The third list is the easiest for them. The most difficult list to do is “What does self-love mean to me.”

My biggest challenge in coaching is the fact that most of my clients start out with negative thoughts about themselves. For instance, their second list, “What I don’t like about myself” is full of what I call lies.

One client wrote down, “I am too fat.” and I respond with “What size dress do you wear?” She looks down and says, “size four”!  I lifted her head and said, “that’s a lie.”  She also wrote “I hate my hair.” I respond with, “Your hair is lovely, it’s so soft.” She responds with, “it has no body.” I look at her and say, “another lie. It’s unfortunate that so many people cannot take compliments. In fact, they do not believe you if you tell them they are smart, beautiful, or even if you like their sweater. Their lack of self-esteem is suffering, and they show you that they are not confident, even when you compliment them.

My goal is to help my clients to truthfully care about themselves. It may matter if they are not raised with love or lived with critical parents, who never complimented them, but they can change or alter this insecurity.

We cannot live in the past, we must live with the now, and the now affects the future. It is not our fault that our parents never knew better. My book “The Stars In Your family” raising kids as to who they are, rather then who they want them  to be is a good read. It is now on Kindle.

Please remember who you are and what you need for yourself. We can be inspired to live a positive life with less worry, anxiety, and extreme intensity. I can help you do that.  Contact: 312-944-7256

Have a happy day. I will!